Rachel. Michigan Native. Avid Coffee Drinker.
Fluid Sexuality. Liberal. Self-Indulgent.
Smoker. Toker. Sexual Being. Blunt.
Open-Minded. Sarcastic.
Commitment-Phobe.
Fucking Lost.
Keep in mind that this is basically my diary. It may be triggering at times for some, so I apologize for that. I write and take photos for me. To document myself. If you have any opinions on what I write, just go to my main blog and put it in my ask/message box so I can laugh at you.
My cat when she knows that I am leaving soon: I love you, let me cuddle on your lap, start purring, and show how much I love you.
My cat when she knows that I have free time to cuddle: Fuck you.
“Gatsby believed in the green light, the orgastic future that year by year recedes before us. It eluded us then, but that’s no matter—tomorrow we will run faster, stretch out our arms farther… . And then one fine morning— So we beat on, boats against the current, borne back ceaselessly into the past.”
I remember my English teacher drawing on the board to make a visual representation of this quote. He drew a boat and a man standing on that boat, reaching out towards the green light, the dream. And then he drew the waves pushing the boat in the opposite direction.
Just thinking about it, especially seeing it drawn was just the saddest thing to me. Just imagine, being in a boat and seeing the dream you’ve always had just a few feet away, but when you reach out to get it, the tide moves you away. You try to reach out further and the tide just keeps carrying you away from it and you spend your whole life just trying to reach out and trying to reach that dream, and then one day, you wake up and realize that your whole life was spent exhausting yourself, trying to get to a dream that wasn’t attainable and you realize that instead of enjoying your life and what you had at the time, you are now older and no wiser and more miserable than you ever had been because you wasted your whole life just trying to get to the green light.
I don’t want that to happen to me, but I’m so scared that it will. That one day I will wake up and realize that I spent my entire life running in place just trying to get to an ideal place that was never real.
I never remembered your birthday or our anniversary, but what I do remember, is the location of every freckle on your face. What I remember is the color of your eyes and the shape of your lips.
I’ve never been good with remembering things that most people find important, but I’ve mapped out your entire face in my mind.
I remember your favorite color, and the clothes you were wearing the first time we met. I remember every detail of our first kiss, our first dance, our first night together.
I’m sorry I never remembered the things you thought important, but I was too busy focusing on every perfect detail of you that I never wanted to forget. Dates just weren’t at the top of that list.
No idea how I took this photo because I have to click a button to even take a photo and my hands are nowhere near the computer, haha.
Anyway, I wore something super girly and out of my comfort zone today. Peach colored top with lace, with a cute sweater thing that has jewels around the edges, and then I just wore normal yoga pants, but seriously. I never wear anything other than sweatshirts. People were shocked. Haha.
Anyway, I felt kinda cute today, but the entire time I was super uncomfortable. I need to learn to be comfortable in things that aren’t extremely baggy on me.
You cannot say that you are “anti-big government” if your idea of government is telling people what they can and can’t do with their bodies, who they can and can’t marry, who they can legally discriminate against, etc. That isn’t small government. That is big government.
Small government is giving people freedon, choice, equal opportunity, etc.
